NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER Lisa Damour, Ph.D director of the internationally renowned Laurel School s Center for Research on Girls, pulls back the curtain on the teenage years and shows why your daughter s erratic and confusing behavior is actually healthy, necessary, and natural Untangled explains what s going on, prepares parents for what s to come, and lets them knoNEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER Lisa Damour, Ph.D director of the internationally renowned Laurel School s Center for Research on Girls, pulls back the curtain on the teenage years and shows why your daughter s erratic and confusing behavior is actually healthy, necessary, and natural Untangled explains what s going on, prepares parents for what s to come, and lets them know when it s time to worry In this sane, highly engaging, and informed guide for parents of daughters, Dr Damour draws on decades of experience and the latest research to reveal the seven distinct and absolutely normal developmental transitions that turn girls into grown ups, including Parting with Childhood, Contending with Adult Authority, Entering the Romantic World, and Caring for Herself Providing realistic scenarios and welcome advice on how to engage daughters in smart, constructive ways, Untangled gives parents a broad framework for understanding their daughters while addressing their most common questions, including My thirteen year old rolls her eyes when I try to talk to her, and only does it when I get angry with her about it How should I respond Do I tell my teen daughter that I m checking her phone My daughter suffers from test anxiety What can I do to help her Where s the line between healthy eating and having an eating disorder My teenage daughter wants to know why I m against pot when it s legal in some states What should I say
Untangled Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER Lisa Damour Ph D director of the internationally renowned Laurel School s Center for Research on Girls pulls back the curtain on the teenage years and shows why your daught
ATTENTION REQUIRED READING FOR PARENTS OF TEEN GIRLSSuch valuable, valuable help from a therapist whose life work centers around providing counsel and working with thousands of teen girls and their parents This book really calmed me down and made me think, Oh, it s ok Oh, it s normal I ll list out what I want to remember Warning Very long When they re complaining about something or dumping their emotions on you just listen They probably won t take any advice, but to be sure you can say, Do you w [...]
My first reaction after reading this book was, OMG MY KIDS ARE GETTING OLD ENOUGH FOR ME TO READ THIS BOOK followed by 30 minutes of weeping.But seriously, if the thought of teenagerhood daunts you, or if you, like us, have a girl who isn t a teen yet but has started acting in ways where the old methods have stopped working, this is really a terrific book It s clear eyed, calm, real It doesn t sugarcoat the pressures and conflicts that come with raising a teen, but it also gives parents realisti [...]
In Untangled, Lisa Damour discusses seven transition phases that girls experience as they progress from childhood to adulthood The phases are relatively self explanatory They are 1 parting with childhood, 2 joining a new tribe, 3 harnessing emotions, 4 contending with adult authority, 5 planning for the future, 6 entering the romantic world, and 7 caring for herself These phases aren t necessarily experienced at specific ages in one specific order, but Damour s outline of them does offer a gener [...]
I haven t done any updates for this book because for my purposes, it wasn t one in which I had time to read from front to back I needed and will continue to need to refer to the sections which for the needs of my girls and how I can help them as well as the three of us together Fantastic book and one I ll refer to often even if it may be too late I pray to God it s not and I cannot thank RandomHouse BallantineBooks and the author Lisa Damour for this gift A genre self help book I ve been in need [...]
I received an ARC of Untangled as a giveaway This book is an invaluable and comprehensive resource for parents of preteen and teenage girls Dr Damour clearly defines the seven strands of adolescence and specifically tailors this book for raising girls This is important because the rate of development is unique for girls and the issues that affect girls differ in many ways from those that affect their male counterparts Dr Damour offers deep insight into the teen female psyche One interesting diff [...]
This book provides a comprehensive overview of 7 states of development in adolescent girls I found the information to be valuable, and in each chapter, the author discusses what s normal and then ends with a When You Should Worry section Although filled with much practical advice, I felt that the author to some extent was inconsistent in regard to her parenting approaches Moreover, I felt that there was so much nuance in how to handle these matters that it appeared as if only a professional like [...]
Pray for me I m the father of a 12 year old daughter.This book is a helpful, though not groundbreaking, book meant to guide parents through the undeniable difficulties of raising girls into strong women at the beginning of the 21st century Damour s approach is generally progressive, feminist, and self reflective, realizing that a lot of the ways we socialize girls and teach them to be polite are also the ways we instill stereotypes All useful fodder for thought She brings in some brain science, [...]
First, I must state that it is thanks to NetGalley that I received an ARC of this book in exchange for a fair and honest review I read the book, than gave it to my close friend who has a very difficult relationship with her daughter Also I thought the book might help me advise her through this rough patch I was not disappointed and I thought the author did a excellent job She shows the why of your teenager behavior and understanding how her mind works at this age I think this is an important rea [...]
I found this book contained many useful, practical, real life insights and discussion points I might need to go buy a copy, as I borrowed from a friend thanks LEAH and think I will want to go back and refer to it from time to time as different things come up It seemed common sense stuff, direct approach to topics in need of discussion and with workable examples.I think my favorite part was actually on the last page of the book In other words, adolescence isn t about us Well, except for the part [...]
This book is probably the most practical, down to earth explanation of female adolescence for a parent in today s world of electronic devices and social media This book joins the pile of books to re read every year until its memorized There is so much the author unpacks about how girls think and why they act the way they do in the teenage years And then Ms Damour takes it further and gives practical advice on how to manage some of the behavior and keep my daughter s self determination intact Man [...]
I don t have daughters, but I see teen girls in my therapy practice, and found this book very useful in understanding teenage behaviors and their developmental purpose Most of the book was also very applicable to understanding my teenage boys So much of the conflict I have experienced with my teens revolve around my expectations and their desire to become their own person Understanding that me stepping back and creating an atmosphere where I recognize my lack of control in their lives has made i [...]
This book notes some interesting studies, makes some very good points, includes some helpful analogies and shares excellent advice for parents raising teenage girls It s nice to have someone frame teen behavior for us in the way the author does, because while we know teens need to exert their independence sometimes we fail to see their behavior in this light The author clearly knows teenagers and covers all the salient points sex, drugs and technology are of course addressed The author offers lo [...]
I listened to the audiobook version from the library I really appreciated the frank, yet kind nature of the author Some of the conversations are uncomfortable nobody wants to think of their teenaged daughter having sexual relations, yet as a parent, we need to be aware of the possibility and how we are going to support our daughters to help them achieve healthy relationships regardless if they are sexual or platonic I appreciated the chapters discussing ways to help our daughters be assertive i [...]
My friend recommended that I read this book When I asked where to get a copy, she said, You need to own it Thanks, Em Filled with the newest brain research and stories from Damour s professional practice and experiences as a school psychologist and mom, this book offers practical suggestions on how to parent adolescent and teen girls in the way that fits their brain development My favorite advice is to frame conversations in terms of how to take care of themselves what to do with their own best [...]
This book is a MUST read for every parent with a tween or teenage girl Dr Damour works almost exclusively with teenage girls in her counseling practice and her love for teenage girls comes through in such a refreshing way I m tired of hearing people complain about teenage girls She covers seven transitional stages that all girls go through and helps parents navigate those transitions with respect and love I listened to the Audible version and loved hearing her tone as she suggested what to say t [...]
I received this book in exchange for an honest review I liked this book It had so may amazing points and strategies that I wished my parents would ve known about This book might be able to help me with my long term goal of becoming a Psychologist I think that everyone should read this, especially women Not only will you learn things about yourself but you will begin to understand the minds of young teens You might even remember what you felt like at that age as well.
Very good book on parenting teen girls I listened and will likely either re read or re listen Great advice on many different issues I recommend this for anyone with a preteen or teen girl.
This was extremely useful for me as a parent of a 14 year old girl who just started high school My kid is bright, beautiful, and very capable, but she still struggles enough to make us worry for her This book really illuminates how being a teenage girl is inherently a struggle, and really your daughter needs to experience some turmoil, baffling swings in maturity and judgment, love hate parental interactions, friendship drama, skepticism of authority, and other challenging stuff This is part of [...]
What a great and absorbing read, filled with clinical and peer reviewed research to buttress claims Damour, who has a PhD from Michigan in clinical psychology and was a Yale grad figures out exactly the right level to pitch her well informed treatise on adolescent girls She argues that girls go through seven stages in their transitions into adulthood and many of those stages felt very familiar to me for which I was grateful, actually, because sometimes I worry I have the only crazy teen around t [...]
I m giving this book five stars even though I have yet to finish it my library copy was due and I m waiting to buy it until it comes out in paperback The few chapters I read were insightful and useful I want to write down all of her wonderful suggestions of phrases to try in the thick of emotionally fraught communication with our sometimes inscrutable kids Her tone throughout is conversational and supportive without being preach y It feels like talking with a really wise and well read friend who [...]
My initially skeptical twelve year old You think a book from the library can tell you about me is the one who kept asking me to read this aloud She kept up a pretense of calling it the silly book, but we both knew she was enjoying insight into what s starting to happen to her emotionally and what makes older teens crazy, in her mind We skipped much of the section on drugs, which she found boring and irrelevant, and some of the description of sex acts that I thought would be alarming for her and [...]
This book was eye opening, engrossing, and life changing I thought the writing was warm and personable almost like chatting with a really smart friend who has all the answers.Channeling the author s respectful strategies towards teenage girls, I diffused two growing arguments with my own daughter this week and recognized how I need to give her greater autonomy No easy feat for a slight control freak like me I plan on buying this book because the occasional reread will only help me parent better. [...]
This book came recommended from a learned friend who is a teacher and someone who has worked with children for years and is also working to raise a daughter I thought this book was excellent and wish I could have read it 10 years ago The tricky part of parenting is that you always have the desire to protect and take care of your children In adolescence, their main desire becomes independence and you have to shift your thinking in order to help them achieve this, along with helping them become ab [...]
This is a really practical and wise approach to parenting teens They have to unhook from the family and parents have to let them unhook without pushing them or taking it personally She gives a lot of great stories and advice Really parenting advice in general don t make it about you Be firm and impose consequences but don t get your ego into it Another great book is conscious parenting, which has been my go to mantra let them be and don t control their growth.
The author presented her advice in an intelligent, non preachy, no scare tactics kind of way I particularly liked her analogy of a teenager s parent being the wall of a pool as the teen goes deeper and deeper into the pool exploring the water, the parent is on the side to hold on to when needed.
I finally finished this book last night I think it was actually kind of interesting to read this book from a child s perspective versus as from an adults Now when I find myself in a bad mood I often think back to different chapters that I have read This book was actually pretty interesting and if you are a psychology nerd like me I recommend D
Great book to read if you are raising a young girl We are just at the edge of the teen years and much of what was covered was relevant even before we get there It helped me feel confident as a parent and to learn ways to support our daughters as they grow and change Highly recommend
This is one of the best parenting books I ve read IN YEARS The author focuses on important areas like harnessing emotions, planning for the future, etc and talks about what s normal, how to face challenges, and how to be aware of serious problems I immediately handed it to my husband after finishing it.
HelpfulI really enjoyed the author s perspective of female adolescence, especially the idea that you should worry if your daughter never rebels or pages back against authority It helped put even some of my own teenage years in a different light.
I highly recommend this book for anyone with young daughters My daughters are preteen and elementary ages so I paid attention with an eye towards the future, but parents with teenage daughters who are in the thick of these stages can get real time advice and guidance from the information in this book I came to think of it as the manual I ve been searching for